Category Archives: Motherhood

An Exercise in Patience

My latest flailing exercise features the buff Australian — the cover shows a perky brunette sweetheart in a skimpy halter top and bouncey doo, but the DVD itself features a male Adonis of gigantic proportions, barely contained in a ripped and rippled muscle shirt.

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Card Me — Please!

I just bought a bottle of beer so that I can make more shampoo. Yeah, that’s right. I pour beer on my head, mixed with a liquid soap that has pronounceable and recognizable words in the ingredient list (Olive Oil, … Continue reading

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Material Possessions Don’t Possess Us

Provincial Afternoon, by the Norwegian Artist, Steve Henderson Tired of Being Youngest and I just returned from a mini-vacation at College Girl’s apartment. For four days, the three of us slept late, wandered around in our jammies, watched movies, played … Continue reading

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The Little Things Don’t Tweet and Ring

One of the phones buzzes; another one shrieks; the third one retches. When they all go off at once it sounds as if the dog is getting sick. Continue reading

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The Multi-tasking Norwegian

Given that the Norwegian Artist, however, is one of the sanest people I know, his digital reading habits in conjunction with the wielding of his brushes apparently don’t mess with his brain as much as living in constant contact with me.

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Reading the Last Page of the Book Is Not a Crime

For some reason, many self-professed deep thinking intellectuals define reality as unmitigated desolation, despondency, and despair, broken up here and there by the occasional smile, sunny day, or successful birthday party. Continue reading

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The (Dressing Room) Walls Come Crashing Down

Those chauvinist males out there who joke about how long it takes women to dress have never seen one re-attire herself in a panic in the middle of the Mart rat cubicle.

Thank God for that. Continue reading

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The Uncommon Cold

The Norwegian Artist, however, believes that the Enemy Cold Virus needs to be attacked head on: sweated out, molested, assaulted, crushed, mashed, mangled, forced into unrelenting hard labor, deprived of oxygen, marched to the edge of the precipice and hurtled over the side. Continue reading

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Sewing, Knitting, Quilting — Real Women and Real Men Do These Things

At the Norwegian Artist’s receptions and opening nights, I appear in something that exists all its own on the planet — no twin at Wal-Mart or Nordstrom’s — what I’m wearing is as unique, unusual, and imperfect as I am. Continue reading

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Home Office Space — The Final Frontier

While designated space is nice, reality is that most of what’s available is taken up by dining room tables and sofas and bedrooms for children still living in the house and toilets and such, and when you want to carve a niche out for your business or hobby, you have to be as creative as what you plan to do once you get the space to do it in. Continue reading

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