Tag Archives: middle age

Theater Rage

Now theaters are like highways — most of the people you encounter there are reasonably normal, but the odd ones — those who float along at 45 miles per hour in a 60 m.p.h. zone, only to accelerate to 75 just during the time that there is a passing lane — make you understand why the term “road rage” was coined. Continue reading

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The Lions and Tigers are WHERE?

I’ve never been one for jelly beans, even clean ones, but the wooden puzzles unleashed in me a mania that had been buried since Tired of Being Youngest was 6 and I sadly packed away her bathtime toys (none of which matched, incidentally). Continue reading

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The Economics of “Stuff”

Each week’s haul she bore to The Happy Friendly Place, which might have been more aptly named Dragon’s Lair, and trebled, quadrupled, and octupled the prices. For awhile this worked, and The Happy Friendly Place thrived.

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Dementia and Cheese

Not having ever traveled to New York or Chicago, I don’t know if Metro-people talk to strangers — and I can understand a reluctance to do so — but in a small town, there is no such thing as a stranger. If a person is standing next to you and he’s reaching for an orange, well, then that’s reason enough to strike up a conversation. If he heads to the bananas next, then it’s time to discuss fruit salad recipes and swap diabetic relative stories.

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Zorro Strikes Again at the Local Baptist Church

So this week’s funeral prodded me into translating talk into action as I dealt with the claims office for our shipping company concerning a painting that we had sent to Rive Gauche Galleries in Scottsdale, AZ. Quite fortunately, the painting arrived unscathed, probably because the frame around it took the hit from the tires that ran over the box and cracked the frame straight through.

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Mr. Spock Knows How to Pronounce “Exacerbate”

In addition to our ability to make memorably embarrassing comments, we all manage to mangle the pronunciation of the English language to such a degree that outsiders assume that we are first generation Norwegians and Poles, as opposed to third.

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Taxation with Way Too Much Representation

At the library itself, the librarians rarely swipe anyone’s card, preferring instead to enter names from memory. One librarian mentioned that people frequently stopped her in the grocery store, asking her if they had any books overdue.

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Not All Chicken Attacks Happen on Farms

I am an aggressive, assertive opinionated dynamo who frequently plows ahead without thought or foresight, and who, if I do not curb my natural inclinations, will push and pull circumstances to mold to my dictation.

Does this sound like the definition of a patient person?

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White Appliances in a Red Economy

I am the product of Depression Era parents, whose combined genetic code of frugality fills every available micron of cellular space, and I could no more exchange a perfectly fine working, yet yawningly prosaic washing machine for the new model than I could feed a roasted rump roast, sliced with gravy, to the dog. Continue reading

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Black Tea with Milk Tastes So Much Better Than Boiled Persimmons

the tea was smokey, vegetal, herbaceous, or malty and it produced a bright finish with pungent overtones, or its liquor, smoothly sweet, led to a smooth and full-bodied cup. The terminology I have picked up enables me to walk into a winery, coffee emporium, or chocalatier’s and sound educated and informed. Continue reading

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