God Is Not a Tinky-Doodle

Posted on June 26, 2013 by This Woman Writes
I have always preferred real people to fake ones. This woman was genuine indeed. The Fruit Vendor, original painting by Steve Henderson, sold.

I have always preferred real people to fake ones. This woman was genuine indeed. The Fruit Vendor, original painting by Steve Henderson, sold.

I don’t do reality shows. They’re fake.

That being said, Tired of Being Youngest dragged the Norwegian Artist and me to the couch to watch MasterChef, with Gordon Ramsey and his two sidekicks, both of whom look, and act, like bouncers in a casino.

“This man is amazing,” TBY, who is halfway through her culinary program, proclaims. Believe me, darling, he knows it.

Me? I’m thinking, “I don’t want my precious child on this program, ever, in front of this overweeningly arrogant trio of . . . of . . .

unkind, far-too-impressed-with-themselves, tinky-doodles.

This is, after all, a family friendly blog.

Like all reality shows, MasterChef operates on the same principle: take a group of ordinary people, put them in a situation over their head, play upon their insecurities, encourage each of them to treat one another badly, verbally and emotionally abuse them, tantalize them now and then with the remote possibility of your approval, and rip them apart in front of the camera.

All human beings are made in the image of God, which means that all human beings are extraordinary. Diaphanous -- original painting at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed, open edition print at Great Big Canvas.

All human beings are made in the image of God, which means that all human beings are extraordinary. Diaphanous — original painting at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed, open edition print at Great Big Canvas.

The judges reign supreme.

In one scene, Joe Bastianich, one of the tinky-doodles, spits out what’s in his mouth, tosses the dish in the garbage, and announces,

“You’re wasting my time.”

How odd. I’m pretty sure he’s paid well for the time he spends on this show.

Okay, okay, so I don’t have to watch this stuff. There are other ways to bond with Tired of Being Youngest. The problem is, too many people, not just TBY, watch shows like this, and the more of it they watch, the more they internalize what it propounds as being normal — berating people, putting them on the spot, encouraging others to put them down (“Who do you think will be the next person out?”), verbally haranguing them and expecting them to answer, politely, “Yes, Chef; No, Chef.”

It reminds me of a scene I observed in a real courtroom, in which the judge orally assaulted the plaintiffs, who had no choice but to answer, “Yes, Your Honor; No, Your Honor.” Believe me, the term “Your Honor” was definitely misapplied.

Thank God He does give it to us every day -- Grace, that is. Give Us This Day, Grace poster by Steve Henderson.

Thank God He does give it to us every day — Grace, that is. Give Us This Day, Grace poster by Steve Henderson.

Being a judge is a serious responsibility, and while it’s a heady experience to control who gets to wear the apron or who pays an exorbitant fine or who gets their children taken away and where, it’s pretty easy to let that heady experience go to one’s head.

Is God that way?

Mercifully, no. While too often human judges play God, God in reality doesn’t imitate human judges.

It’s popular, within contemporary society, to denigrate God as being unfair because of all the suffering in the world, but if you want to be fair about the whole thing, it’s wise to look at who is actually causing the suffering. Who is lying, stealing, embezzling, conniving, hurting — pretty much for the sake of achieving power and/or money? Not God. He’s All Powerful, and He owns everything anyway.

We teach best by example, not by tearing down. Into the Surf, original painting by Steve Henderson sold; licensed open edition art print at Great Big Canvas

We teach best by example, not by tearing down. Into the Surf, original painting by Steve Henderson sold; licensed open edition art print at Great Big Canvas

Years ago, when Eldest Supreme was 7, she wanted to play Monopoly. Fifteen minutes into the game, it became obvious that she was going to go down before me and the Norwegian Artist. In one of those telepathic parenting moments, we came up with a new way of playing the game:

“Let’s see how long we can keep EVERYONE in this game!” we announced. Through loans, gifts, and forgiveness, we kept at it for two hours, and we didn’t flatten our child’s joy. We all won.

So that doesn’t make a good reality show. I get it. The tinky-doodles don’t come out on top, and we don’t all laugh — uncomfortably — at their barbs.

But the people with the power — the parents in this case — chose to use that power for good: to encourage, to teach, to be merciful with someone who was smaller and less experienced than they. We didn’t need to put our child down so that we could build ourselves up.

I am so glad that, when time ends and we stand before the Ultimate Judge, we will not be on MasterChef.

The artwork in this article is by my Norwegian Artist, Steve Henderson. Find Steve’s artwork in the following formats at the following links:

Manufacturers and retailers, license Steve’s art through Art Licensing.

Available in paperback and digital form at Amazon.com

Available in paperback and digital form at Amazon.com

Do you know why I’m so passionate about ordinary people? Because I’m one of them. As a homemaker, I raised four children on the Norwegian Artist’s modest salary, and I know what it feels like to make ends meet. We own our home, our car, our land, and our business, and we did it without living like weird people. Like us, you can Live Happily on Less, making your resources stretch to fit your life and your lifestyle. Available at Amazon.com in both paperback and digital format.

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Achieving Impossible Dreams

Posted on June 24, 2013 by This Woman Writes
If you want to achieve your dreams, you've got to reach out for them first. Dream Catcher, original painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition print at Great Big Canvas

If you want to achieve your dreams, you’ve got to reach out for them first. Dream Catcher, original painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition print at Great Big Canvas

From Start Your Week with Steve, the weekly newsletter of Steve Henderson Fine Art —

Steve Says:

“When we tell people what we do — I paint, Carolyn writes — the general response is, ‘Wow, that’s my dream job.’

 “It is ours as well, and like any dream, it takes a lot of work to achieve, and maintain.

“One thing we’ve learned about following our dreams is that frequently, you will be out of step with the rest of the world, and the bigger your dream and the harder you work at it, the more people you encounter who shake their heads and say, ‘I don’t know guys. It looks pretty difficult to me.’

“They’re not off base, these people. They’re discouraging, but they’re not off base.

“But they’re also missing the point. Achieving a dream is never simple, along the lines of sailing around the world on a cruise ship. It’s more along the lines of what you see in the Shore Leave poster on this page — grabbing the rowboat, because that’s the only thing you’ve got, filling it with provisions, and starting out on the journey.

If you don't have yacht, but you do have a rowboat, then use the rowboat. Follow Your Dreams poster by Steve Henderson

If you don’t have yacht, but you do have a rowboat, then use the rowboat. Follow Your Dreams poster by Steve Henderson

“You probably won’t find yourself out on the ocean in one of those things, but just the time on the river will be adventurous enough. You will be moving along and in the river of opportunity, growing stronger and more skilled each day, learning to function with what you have, and going places.

“Do you have a big dream, but a small rowboat? If that’s all you’ve got, then use it to the best of your ability. It may not take you to China, but it will take you someplace different from where you are now, and at the end of the day, when you beach the boats and rest for the night, you will be that much closer to your destination than you were this morning.”

Read more, and subscribe, at this week’s Start Your Week with Steve

Available in paperback and digital form at Amazon.com

Available in paperback and digital form at Amazon.com

Do you not make enough money to follow your dream? Think twice. It is possible to Live Happily on Less.

Find Steve’s artwork in the following formats at the following links:

Manufacturers and retailers, license Steve’s art through Art Licensing.

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Viggo Mortensen — Will You Drop By?

Posted on June 21, 2013 by This Woman Writes
Even when he's irritated, I'm sure that Viggo does not look like this when he's buying stamps at the Sandpoint, ID post office.

Even when he’s irritated, I’m sure that Viggo does not look like this when he’s buying stamps at the Sandpoint, ID post office.

You won’t believe this, but yesterday I spoke with someone who knows someone who knows Viggo Mortensen’s (Aragorn, son of Arathorn, from the Lord of the Rings Trilogy) brother.

The Norwegian Artist and I were in Sandpoint, Idaho, having driven 4 hours in the rain to deliver paintings for the Norwegian’s solo show, and as the gallery assistant and I were discussing the area’s attractions, Viggo came up. Apparently, he lives there, sort of.

I mean, I would live there, sort of, if I could — trees, mountains, alpine lakes, cute downtown — but our second home is, well, we don’t have one, and if we did it’d be an awful hassle transporting the three goats back and forth in a Honda Fit. It was enough packing 30 paintings in there, and they don’t create little black pellets that look like chocolate covered raisins. They also don’t chew the seats.

Yes, we fit 30 fairly good sized paintings, like this one, in a Honda Fit. She Danced by the Light of the Moon, original painting through Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print through Great Big Canvas

Yes, we fit 30 fairly good sized paintings, like this one, in a Honda Fit. She Danced by the Light of the Moon, original painting through Steve Henderson Fine Art; prints at Steve Henderson Collections.

But Viggo escapes to Sandpoint, which may seem surprising if your impression of a small town is that everyone knows everyone — which is true, actually — and has nothing better to do than hound famous faces — which is not.

While in our little town, we’re still talking about Matthew Fox (Jack on Lost) dropping by to hunt deer, we’re just as passionately discussing our brand new, great big, genuine hotel that looks like a hotel and even has a covered swimming pool. I mean, you’ve got to put these things in perspective.

Of course we’re nosy — all people are. But we’re nosy about everyone, regardless of whether we’ve seen their face 15 feet high on a movie screen, and we spend as much time giving one another space to breathe as we do talking to, and about them. After all, most of us live in small towns not because of the incredible employment opportunities, but because we can live quietly, independently, and with a greater level of intellectual freedom — really — than we could in a large, impersonal, but intrusive metropolis.

In a small town, there is time to think, dream, reflect, and jump in puddles. Reflection, original at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

In a small town, there is time to think, dream, reflect, and jump in puddles. Reflection, original at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Steve Henderson Collections.

Rural America is a beautiful place because there is space, silence, and that aforementioned freedom to live independently — keeping chickens, growing a garden, milking goats, and planting organic heirloom corn that is not genetically modified. Because we do these things, and we see the value of doing them, we are wary of others — politicians and mega-corporations come to mind — telling us what to eat, influencing our procreation habits, insisting that we obtain this latest vaccination, peering into our gardens to see what’s growing there, manipulating the free market to limit which light bulbs are available to use in our kerosene lamps.

And because we live more closely to the ground, so to speak, we treasure what we have, not the least of which is our privacy. It’s easy to forget that our national heritage is deeply steeped in individual people and families fighting the elements and reaching for a dream, and while we work collectively as a community, we do so while maintaining our independence. Independence is so important to our personality as Americans that our national holiday features the word prominently in its name. This spirit of independence is what made us great in the first place. It’s what will knock us down and out if we lose it.

So Viggo, as much as I would appreciate it if you would drop by (Redtail Gallery: June 21 – July 13; reception June 28 from 5:30 to 7:30) and look at Steve’s art, I understand your reticence. I assure you, we’ll treat you like everyone else, giving you plenty of space to look at the paintings, eat crackers, and chat if you are so inclined.

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I Want to Be Moses

Posted on June 19, 2013 by This Woman Writes

I want to be Moses.

There are several impediments to being Moses, not the least of which he was not female. Promenade, original and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art, licensed open edition print at Great Big Canvas.

There are several impediments to being Moses, not the least of which he was not female. Promenade, original and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art, licensed open edition print at Great Big Canvas.

Admittedly, there are a few impediments: Moses is another person; he is no longer alive; he was male — even in today’s remarkably tolerant societal structure these are factors of consideration.

But no. I want to be Moses because he was God’s friend. He talked to, sometimes talked back at, God; was free to express his misgivings, doubts, and frustrations; and he lived a really long time in really good shape. He got angry now and then; anybody who has ever felt bad about snapping at someone else in a temper might want to conjure up the image of Moses hurling the stones with the 10 commandments to the ground. Makes a broken coffee mug look minor.

And despite all this, God delighted in him.

If I can’t be Moses, I will gladly settle for Joshua or Caleb, the only two men in their generation who lived through wandering in the desert, because they were the only two out of 600,000-plus warriors who said, “Yes! We can do this, because God says we can.”

Same problem though: another person, no longer alive, male.

But I suppose it’s more of the concept of the thing, and one of my problems is that I aim too low. Most of us do.

We aim too low, most of us; we need to dream bigger. Dream Big poster based on Bold Innocence, by Steve Henderson.

We aim too low, most of us; we need to dream bigger. Dream Big poster based on Bold Innocence, by Steve Henderson.

Crunch the numbers here: 600,000 warriors, add women and children, what are we coming up with — several million people? And the main thing we hear about these several million people is that 1) They don’t want to talk to God personally but would prefer that Moses do it and 2) They’re not particularly known for their strong, individual spirituality.

This sounds like contemporary Christianity, which encourages followers to look to the pulpit for weekly teaching, rounding out any gaps with a small group study or workbook-led Bible study time telling them what the words on the page are saying. I flipped through a book the other day, written by a notable Christian author whose name on the book’s cover is bigger than the title, who (paraphrased) said,

“Commentaries are vital to understanding the Bible. Do not think of studying the Bible without a commentary at your side.”

Perhaps it would be better if he had ended the sentence with, “Do not think.”

Granted, the Book gets a little complicated, but it has been conveniently (and at the cost of many lives) translated into English, Spanish, French, Norwegian — quite a few languages of choice — and we read complicated books in whatever language we speak all the time. Millions of readers of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice derive great enjoyment from the author’s wisdom, and they pass on what they’ve learned to others. Most of them manage just fine without workbook sheets and study guides. That they do not understand every single word which Jane wrote does not prevent them from enjoying what they do. And I don’t think that they’re particularly open to the concept that only professorial types are qualified to speak on and about Jane.

Blue Ribbon by Steve Henderson of Steve Henderson Fine Art

Each of us has our individual path to walk, with God. Blue Ribbon by Steve Henderson Fine Art.

Millions of Israelites were content to let Moses speak to God for them. Millions of Christians underestimate their ability to speak to, question, walk with, understand, and love God, without the proddings and instruction of a leader, a study guide, a DVD, or a facilitator. In their concern to avoid getting something “wrong,” intelligent people rely upon others to interpret truth for them, intrinsically believing that these people must be interpreting everything “right.” Who needs the Holy Spirit when we have Ph.D.s?

And while these leaders are presumably more qualified than the rest of us because they have purportedly studied the intricacies of Greek and Hebrew and Aramaic and Latin (don’t bet on it), this doesn’t give us excuse to hand over the reins of our learning about, interacting with, and walking beside God to a third person party. Others, “experts” or not, can be a part of the process, if we so choose, but our walk with God is just that — our individual and unique walk with God.

So why can’t I, or you, be Moses? He was God’s friend.

Same God, interacting with a different person. I’m sure if we ask Him, He’ll respond.

Manufacturers and retailers, license Steve’s art through Art Licensing.

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Vacationing Every Week

Posted on June 17, 2013 by This Woman Writes
An enchanted, magical, sacred place in the Wallowa Mountains. Peace, original oil painting at Steve Henderson Fine Art.

An enchanted, magical, sacred place in the Wallowa Mountains. Peace, original oil painting at Steve Henderson Fine Art.

 From the Start Your Week with Steve Newsletter of Steve Henderson Fine Art:

Steve Says:

“Recently, Carolyn and I spent some time in the Wallowa Mountains of Oregon, frequently described as the Swiss Alps of the Northwest.

“It was a busman’s holiday, whatever a busman is, but I was there to judge the regional art festival, and in between the actual judging, the evening reception, and hours of talking to artists about their work (which I enjoy, very much) Carolyn and I hiked the area, absorbed the silence, and, in the evenings, watched episode after episode of Doc Martin.

Time to rest, reflect, and meditate. Queen Anne's Lace, original and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

Time to rest, reflect, and meditate. Queen Anne’s Lace, original and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

“So we rested in between working, which is a very necessary element to working well. We slipped the vacation in with the work week.

“While it’s not every week that we are able to travel to a beautiful spot and enjoy its environs, we do manage to take a mini-vacation every week, by being insistent about taking one day, every week, completely off.

“In our case, it’s Sunday, simply because that is what works best for our family and our work schedule, but it really doesn’t matter what the day is, as long as we find one and take it off.

“Much as I love painting, I don’t paint that day, simply because my mind and body need a rest. I don’t do errands, fix fencing, or embark upon anything that resembles a chore or obligation. I am just as likely to find myself sitting in the hammock with a book as I am in the garden, pulling weeds and surveying my Kingdom of Green.

“In short, I rest.

Literally and figuratively, it's important to leave the crowd and noise behind on a regular basis. Leave the Crowd Behind poster, based on Last Light in Zion, at Steve Henderson Fine Art

Literally and figuratively, it’s important to leave the crowd and noise behind on a regular basis. Leave the Crowd Behind poster, based on Last Light in Zion, at Steve Henderson Fine Art

“I am fortunate in that I can devote an entire day to this, but if I couldn’t (and there have been times in my life when this was so), I made sure to allot myself as long of a time as I could, each week, for this purpose.

“It’s not selfish. It’s not unreasonable. It’s not impossible.

“But it is necessary. As necessary as plugging the phone into the charger and letting its battery recharge.”

Read more, and subscribe to the free weekly newsletter, at Start Your Week with Steve.

Find Steve’s artwork in the following formats at the following links:

Manufacturers and retailers, license Steve’s art through Art Licensing.

Posted in Art, Beauty, blogging, Business, Culture, Current Events, Daily Life, Encouragement, Family, frugal living, Growth, holiday, home, homeschooling, inspirational, Job, Life, Lifestyle, News, Personal, Random, self-improvement, success, vacation, Work | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Exhausted Smiley Face Emoticon

Posted on June 14, 2013 by This Woman Writes
Ever seen one of these?

Ever seen one of these? The smiley face created by Harvey Ball in 1963.

This has gone on long enough. It’s time to discuss the smiley face — 🙂

Isn’t it adorable? I confess that I just learned how to create it by reading an E-How article.  🙂

I’ll stop now. I know you’re tired of the thing. :-0

But whether or not I continue to insert the symbol after every sentence, you can’t get away from it, and if you start to count how many e-mails, text messages, Facebook posts, Tweets, and other contemporary communication methods assault you with it daily, you come up with a decently sized number.

And the interesting point is, the smiley emoticon frequently accompanies 1) an insensitive comment, 2) an insult, or 3) a confrontational statement, along the lines of,

You’re right. Those pants are a little unflattering. 🙂

I thought that you were a jerk last night. 🙂

With all due respect, your political opinions are off-base. Perhaps you should just shut up. 🙂

Human interaction. No technological triumph can trump it. Beachside Diversions, available as an original painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine art; as a licensed, open edition print at Great Big Canvas.

Human interaction. No technological triumph can trump it. Beachside Diversions, available as an original painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine art; as a licensed, open edition print at Great Big Canvas.

In the deep primeval past, when we communicated face to face or, more recently, by telephone, one had to be either inordinately insensitive or amazingly good to vituperate someone without their quite realizing what had just been done. For too many years I knew a woman — happily well out of my life now — who was brilliant, simply brilliant at delivering a venomous expression of hostile malevolence with a honeyed, gentle smile and the meek demeanor of a saint.

Oh, this woman was sweet. Every interaction with her induced an emotionally diabetic glucose reaction that left me with a bitter sensation in my spirit and mouth, but oddly, many people did not see, or chose not to see, this.

But then again, she was really, really good, and she chose carefully and wisely the directions of her barbs. The cunning, crafty, clever part of me — my default, and I assure you that, in the days past when I fed the beast within I was magnificently accomplished at the craft — couldn’t help but admire how good this woman was at what she did, which is only to be expected because she practiced so diligently.

The woman who has fortunately sailed far away from my life was as skilled at malevolence as the master sailor is with negotiating the sea. Golden Opportunity, original at Steve Henderson Fine art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas.

The woman who has fortunately sailed far away from my life was as skilled at malevolence as the master sailor is with negotiating the sea. Golden Opportunity, original at Steve Henderson Fine art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas.

Ooh. Nice shot. 🙂

Communication, for good, bad, ugly, or kind, is a gift given to humans (this is not the time to bring up dolphins that converse and chimpanzees trained to use sign language), and we are rapidly degenerating in our ability to use it. Rather than take time to consider our words, and how they will impact the person hearing, or reading, them, we slap out a text and punctuate it with an emoticon, frequently leaving the recipient confused at our ambiguity.

Is the person addressing us angry, or not? Is there some issue that needs to be resolved? What are they really saying?

If we shoot back, “What are you really saying?” we may get,

So, are we an educated people are not? Let's start acting like it. Embrace Each Day poster based upon Steve Henderson's original painting, Provincial Afternoon.

So, are we an educated people are not? Let’s start acting like it. Embrace Each Day poster based upon Steve Henderson’s original painting, Provincial Afternoon.

I think you know. 🙂

Well, gosh, that really helps.

Theoretically, we are an educated people, and judging by the amount that taxpayers put into our contemporary educational system we should speak, write, and dance like Einstein, but we don’t. We have much to say but are so reluctant to enter into the fray of human emotions and potential confrontation that we don’t say it, at least not clearly.

It takes courage and conviction to look a person in the eye (you can’t do this in a text) and express our true thoughts, but the potential fruit of genuine communication is honesty, understanding, and a moving forward in a relationship.

That’s a good thing. 🙂

Read more about language and how it is used and mis-used in my earlier article, Christians: Please Stop Talking Like Weird People.

Find Steve Henderson’s artwork at

Manufacturers and retailers — license Steve’s work through Art Licensing

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Christians: Please Stop Talking Like Weird People

Posted on June 12, 2013 by This Woman Writes

So tell me, does this sentence sound normal to you?

“In our efforts to live intentionally as an authentic community of believers, we seek out the small-group dynamics of passionate discipleship.”

To speak effectively and realistically as Christians, we do well to take time and gather our thoughts. Gathering Thoughts, original oil painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

To speak effectively and realistically as Christians, we do well to take time and gather our thoughts. Gathering Thoughts, original oil painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

If you answered no, Thank God.

If you answered yes, it’s highly likely that you are a regular church attender, and your life, your vocabulary, and your walk as a Christian have been infiltrated by contemporary pulpit-speak, kind of along the lines of an Oregon wheat field being contaminated by genetically modified wheat.

I don’t know where the gurus at the top are getting this language — oh wait, maybe I do: 21st century corporate business, education, and government — but an increasing number of Christians are earnestly talking about “being authentic,” “intentionally living,” and “moving forward with passion.”

I am so, so, so glad that Jesus didn’t speak this way.

I would so, so, so appreciate it if Christians would stop doing so.

It’s so . . . obsequious somehow to abjectly emulate the abstruse speech of superintendent hegemony in the effort to convey simple truths. How ironic that, when we want to say, “I seek to be real, genuine, and approachable,” we express it with the term, “effective authenticity.”

If you want to be real, then be real -- not "authentic." Be Yourself poster by Steve Henderson, based upon the original painting Spirit of the Canyon

If you want to be real, then be real — not “authentic.” Be Yourself poster by Steve Henderson, based upon the original painting Spirit of the Canyon

Does anybody outside of the group — or even inside of it, actually — understand this term, whether they’re living intentionally or not?

(And as a side note, what does it look like to live unintentionally? Does that mean that you’re dead?)

I don’t know much about ancient Aramaic, the language that Jesus spoke while He was on this earth, but judging by its translation into English, Jesus talked in a fairly straightforward manner, frequently conveying simple yet complex ideas by telling stories. Proper and improper group dynamics, something so vital in contemporary churches, meant little to a Savior who interacted with people one on one, looking deep into their souls and beyond externals like tattoos, rough language, or whether or not their bra strap was showing.

What does love look like? Gentle, kind, protective, unconditional. Dandelions, original painting available at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

What does love look like? Gentle, kind, protective, unconditional. Dandelions, original painting available at Steve Henderson Fine Art; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

It really didn’t matter to Jesus that he sounded erudite and smooth; He wasn’t concerned that followers would drop away if He didn’t use PowerPoint; He never wore a three-piece suit — and yes, I know that they didn’t exist then.

What did matter to Him was a strong, central, unwavering message: “God loves you. So much that you can’t possibly comprehend the magnitude of that love. Accept that love. It’s real.”

Now, how are we, as Christ’s followers, going to convey that message to the people around us? While words matter, actions matter more, and the first step is to bask in, believe, and soak up Christ’s love into our own souls, so that we can pass it on to others by being loving ourselves.

The second is to be real — not authentic, not intentional, not incomprehensible by relying upon weak, corporate-based vocabulary to essentially say nothing.

Be real real real -- your amazing, unique, one of a kind self. Aphrodite, original sold; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

Be real real real — your amazing, unique, one of a kind self. Aphrodite, original sold; licensed open edition fine art print at Great Big Canvas

But real. Ourselves. Using language that fits who and what we are, not copying pseudo-speak that gives the illusion of intelligence and perspicacity.

And lest you get me on the last word of the last paragraph, I really do talk that way, being one of the few people — actually the only people — I know who uses the word “obfuscate” in ordinary speech, but if it’s any help, I tend to mispronounce it.

It’s unintentional. Ah, at last, the word used sensibly.

As Christians, we will always seem weird to people who are not, but let it be for the right reasons: because we touch the untouchables, speak out and speak up for what is right and honest and good, make decisions based upon principle as opposed to monetary gain.

Not because we obfuscate.

If you want to learn to write — and speak, more clearly, check out my book Grammar Despair: Quick, simple solutions to problems like “Do I say him and me or he and I?” $8.99 paperback and $5.99 digital at Amazon.com.

Find Steve Henderson’s artwork at

Manufacturers and retailers — license Steve’s work through Art Licensing

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Achieving Success

Posted on June 11, 2013 by This Woman Writes
Confident, classy, unorthodox -- the successful woman. Lady of the Lake, original painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; open edition fine art canvas print at Great Big Canvas

Confident, classy, unorthodox — the successful woman. Lady of the Lake, original painting and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art; open edition fine art canvas print at Great Big Canvas

 From the Start Your Week with Steve Newsletter by Steve Henderson Fine Art

Steve Says:

“Have I made a success of my life?

“This is one of those thoughts that arrives unawares, unannounced, and uninvited, generally around 2 a.m., but it can show up any time.

“And the answer to it depends one hundred percent on what your definition of success is: money, fame, and/or power are the standard indicators by which many of us go by, even when we don’t try to.

“But in the end, and there is an end, because death is even more certain than taxes, the ultimate definition of success is how well we lived the life that we were given.

“What is the old saying? ‘Nobody regrets on their deathbed that they didn’t spend more time at work,’ and it’s true.

A successful life involves just that -- living, and living with joy and contentment. Into the Surf -- original painting sold through Steve Henderson Fine Art; open edition fine art canvas print available through Great Big Canvas

A successful life involves just that — living, and living with joy and contentment. Into the Surf — original painting sold through Steve Henderson Fine Art; open edition fine art canvas print available through Great Big Canvas

“When we look back with regret, it is for the lost opportunities to spend time with the people who matter to us, to tell someone how much they mean to us, to feed somebody who is hungry or comfort a child who is frightened.

“If we want to be a success while we are alive, then we can pursue those hidden opportunities, the ones that don’t make our paycheck or Twitter follower count larger, while we still have the energy and time to do so.

“Carolyn discusses this concept of success as well this week in her blog, This Woman Writes, with the article, “You Can Be Successful without Owning Goats.”

Read the rest, and subscribe, at Start Your Week with Steve

Steve sells his fine artwork in various formats to accommodate all budgets.

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You Can Be Successful without Owning Goats

Posted on June 7, 2013 by This Woman Writes

When I was a kid, all successful people went to college, because if you didn’t, you weren’t a success.

So, if success means that you own a boat, does it matter what the boat looks like? Shore Leave, original and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art, open edition print at Great Big Canvas

So, if success means that you own a boat, does it matter what the boat looks like? Shore Leave, original and signed limited edition print at Steve Henderson Fine Art, open edition print at Great Big Canvas

Whatever a success is.

I think it means that you bring home a chunky paycheck, replace your car every three years, make payments on a home with more bathrooms than bedrooms, and eat out three times a week.

My God, I’m a failure. I never felt like one.

I did graduate from college, which theoretically qualifies me for success-hood, but I majored in English and didn’t go on to become a famous journalist the way my high school teachers thought I would. I married a good man, had four fine children, and homeschooled them. We replace our car when it refuses to move another mile, have fewer bathrooms than daughters, and consider it eating out when we dine on the porch.

Oh, and I own goats. That’s never one of the standard qualifications for being a success, but I never, ever have to run to the grocery store to buy milk. Bill Gates couldn’t say that. Well, probably he could, since he probably never, every enters a grocery store for any reason but simply sends the housekeeper, but you know what I mean.

When you live in the country, the last thing you want to do is run to the store because you ran out of milk for the morning tea. Off the Grid, original oil painting by Steve Henderson

When you live in the country, the last thing you want to do is run to the store because you ran out of milk for the morning tea. Off the Grid, original oil painting by Steve Henderson

So what am I getting at?

We have a disturbing tendency, in American society, to define ourselves by what we do as opposed to who we are, by how much we make as opposed to how well we live, and we make our decisions accordingly.

And, being Americans who want it all and believe that this is achievable, we want to be rich and famous and important and knowledgeable and healthy and wrinkle free and contented and loved by our dog (loved by our cat never comes into the equation, no matter who or what we are).

And unfortunately, when we realize that we can’t, we’re frequently fine with dropping the “contented” and being loved by our dog part. The money and accolades received by other humans are so vital to the definition of success, that we can be unhappy happy people because we simply don’t realize the value of what we do have.

This is where the goats come in.

The other evening when I was milking them, I became conscious that, for the last 20 minutes, I had been non-stop singing, in rhythm with the motion of milking, deep and thought provoking verses like this:

The signs of success may be different from what you think. Goat photo by Steve Henderson Fine Art

The signs of success may be different from what you think. Goat photo by Steve Henderson Fine Art

“Ba-dah-ba-dum-dum-dum (squirt-squirt), Ba-dah-ba-dummmmm,”

and I thought,

“I never realized this, but I’m happy.”

I’m not rich, I’m not famous, I’m not powerful, I’m sitting on a broken chair next to a goat, and though I don’t have to buy milk at the grocery store I also don’t have a housekeeper to send there to buy bananas.

But I’m happy.

And if success is what makes people happy, then I guess that I’m very, very successful, and since I sing when I milk the goats, it must mean that, somehow, owning goats is an essential part of being a success.

I suppose it’s as good of a definition as any.

Don’t let me box you in. If you don’t own goats, or don’t have more bathrooms than you do bedrooms, or don’t have a housekeeper to send to the store to buy — or not buy — milk, you can still be a success.

You just have to redefine the word into something worth achieving.

Coming soon — my new book, Live Happily on Less: 52 Ideas to Renovate Your Life and Lifestyle. Saving money does not have to be a convoluted, difficult process — and it can actually be fun.

Like me on Facebook, and I’ll post when it’s published. I’ll also post it here, so if you’re not following me already, I invite you to do so — you can subscribe to this blog by e-mail by entering your e-mail address in the box at the top right of this page.

In the meantime, you can read more of me through Life Is a Gift (Kindle), The Jane Austen Driving School (Kindle), and Grammar Despair: Quick, simple solutions to problems like, “Do I say him and me or he and I?”

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What Unconditional Love Looks Like

Posted on June 5, 2013 by This Woman Writes

We were at a Mexican restaurant the other day, and lest you think we’re being profligate here, we pretty much eat out when we are invited to do so. The rest of the time, being amazing cooks (with the notable exception of the Norwegian Artist, who is an amazing Norwegian Artist, so nobody’s complaining), we eat, and invite others, in.

afternoon tea party childhood country summer

Most of the time, we eat in. Afternoon Tea, art print at Steve Henderson Collections.

To my right was Small Person — demanding, determined, adorable, and four — and while she was prattling her way through the menu, the rest of us were ordering. When the waiter collected the menus, she hung on to hers.

The Son and Heir and I exchanged glances across the table, both thinking the same thought:

“Someone has the potential of being a brat here.”

I gently wrested the menu from her hands and gave it to the waiter. The next moment found me with a quietly weeping Small Person at my side. This was not a tantrum (after 25 years and four kids, I recognize these things) as opposed to a broken-hearted human being, tears rolling down her soft, perfect cheeks.

“What’s wrong?” I asked. The Son and Heir leaned forward, concerned.

“I don’t . . . get . . . to eat,” she sobbed.

lilac country flowers girl toddler spring garden

Seriously? Decent people would tease an innocent, trusting child? No, decent people protect children. Lilac Festival, art print from Steve Henderson Collections.

Instant comprehension, and if I hadn’t been such a supercilious adult I would have recognized that this endearingly precocious little girl thought we had brought her to this special place, where we were having a special time, and deliberately ignored her.

“We’re all sharing with you,” the Son and Heir instantly reassured.

“You’ll have a special plate with something from all of us,” I added.

Thank God. The tears stopped. She smiled as we described that she would get part of a tamale, part of an enchilada, chile relleno, taco, tostado, chimichanga, even fried ice cream. The kid was getting it all, and she didn’t have to deal with the greasy refried beans.

That incident stayed with me throughout the week and beyond, having instantly pierced my soul with its pathos, and my major thought was this:

reading mother child seaside coast family memories

Love, cherish, protect — we are gentle and kind with the little people in our care. Seaside Story — art print from Steve Henderson Collections.

“I would never tease and mislead an innocent child — one I love deeply, incidentally — in that way.”

You wouldn’t either, would you? I mean, what kind of slimy, repulsive, arrogant lizard would play games like that?

How about . . . God?

Not really — He isn’t that way — but too many of us mistakenly think of Him as if He were — a Master Puppeteer pulling our strings from some place way out of our reach, teasing us, “testing” us, “bringing us out of our comfort zone,” “being intentional” — whatever that means — frustrating us to the point that when we pray to Him, we feel as if we have to be ultra specific, or He will pointedly and perversely misunderstand what we really mean.

Or, if we momentarily think an uncharitable thought — which we all do, all the time — He’ll turn His back and walk away.

But are these actions of Someone who loves us, and loves us deeply?

Does He bring us to the restaurant, promising joy, and then snatch the menu from our hands, laughing at our hurt?

I don’t think so.

wild child childhood girl running imagination play pretend seaside

Even in our wild child moments, God loves us and is patient with us. Wild Child, art print from Steve Henderson Collections.

In case you haven’t noticed, I love Small Person. Deeply. Unreservedly. And not for anything that she has done or accomplished (and although she’s amazing — simply amazing — there’s a limit to the significant accomplishments a four-year-old can put on her resume) but for no other reason that she Is.

Extrapolate that into your own life.

God loves you. Deeply. Unreservedly. Not for anything that you have done, but solely because of who you Are. He delights in you, marvels at the soft perfection of your skin (even if it’s wrinkled), wants to hear you talk, never leaves you alone to battle problems you are too young to conquer.

When you’re a brat, He doesn’t beat you, doesn’t throw His hands up and slam the door on the way out, doesn’t call you names, but gently directs you to a better way of acting.

That’s unconditional love. It’s something adult humans instinctively practice with young, helpless children.

It’s something God practices with us, all the time and perfectly.

 

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